• Skip to main content
  • Skip to primary sidebar

Dr. John Townsend

Dr. John Townsend and his team offer executive coaching, corporate consulting, and leadership training in a variety or programs. Join us today!

mental health

3 Ways to Keep Anxiety From Taking Control of Your Life

June 26, 2018 by Dr. John Townsend Leave a Comment

Everyone feels anxious every now and again. Anxiety is just a fact of life and a perfectly normal emotion. Unfortunately, though, certain life events can lead us to feel a little more than just normal anxiety. These events might include your children getting married and starting families, the death of a loved one, job loss or transition.

All of these life events can cause an overwhelming sense of dread, which is not a healthy way to go through life.

What Does Anxiety Feel Like?

Anxiety, as an emotion, can stem from anything that is stressful or disconcerting. These days, some people experience this emotion simply by watching the news for a few minutes!

So, what happens when you experience anxiety physically?

  • First, you enter a heightened state of consciousness. You’re more alert.
  • Second, you feel some kind of fear about the future or the situation. There’s a dread, like something bad is coming.
  • Third, you have a fear and must be ready for action. That’s where the body gets involved. Your heart beats faster and you’re breathing faster because you’re preparing to get out of danger. Think of it like the “fight or flight” methodology.

Before I talk about the right way to approach feelings of anxiety, I want to first tell you about a few wrong ways approaches to anxiety.

Don’t ignore your anxiety! Despite what you may think,  “I gotta just push through” mentality is not healthy. It’s a really bad idea to ignore your anxiety because the emotion is trying to tell you something. Ignoring anxiety can potentially lead to bad decisions, poor choices, and even health problems.

Similarly, stop shaming yourself about anxiety. Don’t make yourself feel bad for experiencing this very normal emotion. Don’t shame yourself and say, “I shouldn’t be feeling like this, I’m being a wimp, I’m being a kid.” No more shaming! Your anxiety is a valid emotion!

3 Healthy Ways to Overcome Anxiety

So far, we’ve agreed to stop ignoring and shaming our anxiety. Now, let me share some healthy ways to deal with anxiety.

  1. Be in a relationship. This can be any relationship with someone who knows you deal with anxiety. Find three or four friends who you can reach out to and say, “From time to time, I deal with anxiety and I need to know I can call you and just say, ‘Can we talk, can you kind of get me off the ledge?'” This must be a relationship where you can comfortably express your feelings. Part of this relationship will require them to give you advice or guidance like, “Why don’t you go jog or go pray?” or something like that. Whatever they suggest should help get your emotions out of the cycle of anxiety by suggesting other activities.
  2. Give yourself a pep talk. I am a huge advocate of taking a moment and reciting the Serenity Prayer to yourself. Say to yourself, “God help me to know the difference between the things I can change, and can’t change, and wisdom to know the difference.” This may seem like a small thing, but it can help change your mindset and start moving forward out of your anxious emotion.
  3. See a therapist. If your anxiety reaches a point where it becomes unmanageable, including impacting your work or home life, it’s time to seek professional help. They can help you sort through what’s going on and what’s driving your anxiety. You can also consider seeing a psychiatrist for medication.

Hard times and anxiety come and go. When you start to feel those anxious emotions, it’s very important to take steps to overcome anxiety before it gets the best of you and disrupts your life in a way that can’t be fixed. I believe you have the faith, hope, and love to overcome anxiety and any other challenge you’re facing.

 

Filed Under: Family, Growth Tagged With: anxiety, conversations, encouragement, growth, listening, mental health, warmth

Suicide: Helping Someone Who is Struggling

June 22, 2018 by Dr. John Townsend Leave a Comment

The recent self-inflicted deaths of Anthony Bourdain and Kate Spade have served as a sad reminder of the reality of suicide, not only among celebrities but also people we know and care about. Unfortunately, most of us know people who have killed themselves, and around 1% of people die in this way.

It is a complex issue, with many variables, such as isolation, failure, loss, substance issues, relationships, media and culture. However, there are things you can do that can help if you know someone who is struggling with suicidality thoughts or behaviors.

Get the facts.  First, get some information about suicide.  There is a ton of research on suicidality because it has become a major health issue. The more you know, the more you can help. Start with wedmd.com and Wikipedia, which can provide good data and resources for more information. Talk to a reputable therapist about it.

Understand the hopelessness. Often, a person will feel completely helpless and hopeless. They are experiencing a situation (a problem in relationships, family, emotions, finances, career or health) which is very painful and difficult, and yet they see nothing further they can do to change the difficulty (helplessness). This then leads them to think that their future will be no better than their present, and probably worse, which destroys positive thoughts about tomorrow (hopelessness). For people in this situation, they often feel that suicide is a rational step, in fact, the only step that makes sense. When you talk to a friend or family member who seems to be having severe difficulties, make sure you let them know you “get it” about the helplessness and hopelessness. It will help them feel not quite so alone and can help them to accept your help and suggestions as well.

Take it seriously.  We hear a great deal about attention-getting behavior and manipulative suicidal attempts.  These can happen, but still, always err on the side of caution. Even if a person is not actually suicidal, they could accidentally kill themselves with their risky behavior. If you hear them talk about wanting to take their lives, or if you see dangerous behavior, talk to them and point them to help: a therapist, doctor or hospital. Don’t be afraid to talk to someone about this, even if the struggling person wants you to keep it a secret. There is simply too much at stake.

About yourself. Finally, if you are having dark thoughts, feelings and behaviors, get help as soon as you can.  Many people have found healing and a good future when they find the right therapist and support system.

If you are struggling, you can contact the National Suicide Prevention Hotline.

 

Get started with TownsendNOW

 

Filed Under: Uncategorized Tagged With: communication, encouragement, health, mental health, suicide

Primary Sidebar

Recent Posts

  • Adult Children: Relating to Them in the Best Way
  • Trusting After Trust Has Been Broken
  • Patience is a Better Friend than a Foe
  • Closure Can Be Overrated
  • Passion

Recent Comments

  • Cecilia on 3 Skills to Help Improve Your Willpower
  • David Heinig on 3 Skills to Help Improve Your Willpower
  • Deb Casey on 3 Skills to Help Improve Your Willpower
  • Peggy on 3 Skills to Help Improve Your Willpower
  • android hack Games on Believe In Yourself

Archives

  • February 2020
  • January 2020
  • December 2019
  • November 2019
  • October 2019
  • September 2019
  • August 2019
  • July 2019
  • June 2019
  • March 2019
  • February 2019
  • December 2018
  • November 2018
  • October 2018
  • September 2018
  • August 2018
  • July 2018
  • June 2018
  • May 2018
  • April 2018
  • March 2018
  • January 2018
  • December 2017
  • November 2017
  • August 2017
  • June 2017
  • May 2017
  • April 2017
  • March 2017
  • December 2016
  • November 2016
  • October 2016
  • May 2016
  • April 2016
  • March 2016
  • February 2016
  • November 2015
  • October 2015
  • September 2015
  • July 2015
  • June 2015
  • April 2015
  • March 2015
  • February 2015
  • January 2015
  • December 2014
  • November 2014
  • October 2014
  • September 2014

Categories

  • Boundaries
  • Communicating
  • Current Events
  • Education
  • Emotions
  • Family
  • Growth
  • Leadership
  • Mentoring
  • Planning
  • Uncategorized

Meta

  • Log in
  • Entries feed
  • Comments feed
  • WordPress.org

Copyright © 2025 · Genesis Framework · WordPress · Log in